I'm not a particularly intelligent guy, and any confession about lacking knowledge is hardly going to be a startling revelation to anyone, but that still doesn't dissuade me from continuing my ongoing quest to answer the important questions, and the current crop is as probably as intriguing as the lancing of a cyst, but I'll plough right in, anyway.
*Why do some people insist on keeping the tags on their baseball caps, and why are they predominantly B-people?
*Why does the Transport For London marketing campaign have the last two letters of 'London' in red?
*Did Pete Doherty really get one away with Kate Moss? If so, how?
*Is 'Test Drive My Girlfriend' the most ridiculous 'reality TV' program in history?
*Why do 'reality TV' shows anger me so much?
*If I was to draft Nick Dal Santo into my Fantasty Football Team, would he instantly have a long-term injury like Hadley and Darcy managed within days of me 'drafting' them?
*Does my drafting genetically alter people?
*Does anyone else have any idea about what I'm babbling about?
*How does Ricky Ponting fail to defend 434?
*Who would win a fight out of Pauline Hanson, and the band Hanson?
*How can the Brits be giving me shit about the CommGames when we doubled their medal tally?
*Why do the French riot every other month?
*Why doesn't Hugh Heffner answer my emails?
*Is 'Brokeback Mountain' a bad film to watch with another bloke?
I need to know these things...
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10 comments:
I loved this post the most. It was the postest with mostest.
Right, you're just making names up now!
Nah, he was that really short wog guy who probably left in year 9 or something. I had heard you two were still good friends!!
In the interests of brevity, here are the solutions to all your questions even though Im sure you never expected them to be answered
1/ because they are b-people
2/ clearly this is to get peeple to get ON the bus/train and not just watch them
3/ well, when a boy and a girl really like each other ...
4/ no at least you get a shag, this show is definitly the worst http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/showbiz/articles/20930127?source=PA
5/ with your luck yes
6/ yes (this has possibilities for abuse)
7/ yes
8/ because he's a tasmanian
9/ definitly pauline hanson
10/ because theyre brits, moaning is the national pastime
11/ because in france the 'people' are more powerful than the govt
12/ he's too busy shagging you twit
13/ yes! although there is rumoured to be a sequal starring jessica alba/halle berry/angelina jolie/eva longoria/scarlett johansen/brittany murphy/sara foster and jessica simpson that has potential :)
I called that number and now am a successful neurosurgeon operating out of a world-renowned medical centre in New York.
Go on, you too could living a life of riches just like I am!!!
I loved this blog so much, I joined the Comancheros.
* Avoid people with baseball caps at all costs. They might actually 'like' baseball
* To attract Brazillians
* He did. They were both on the juice and neither of them remember it
* No. They are all equally ridiculous and non-real
* You watch them, it's your own fault
* Hopefully for one week, before this weekends Geelong vs. StK game.
* Only if you are an RNA replicator virus
* Unfortunately yes
* Because he was thinking about the 'Bourbon & Beefsteak' incident and his lawyer girlfriend, and asking a Tasmanian to think of three things at once is one thing too many
* Pauline Hanson would beat the living suitcase out of the Seventh Day Adventists. The Devil wins every time.
* The British are obsessed with failure in sport. Australians are obsessed with spending a million dollars per medal while people around the world (including our own indigenous people) starve and die from preventable diseases.
* The cheese. It's the cheese.
* Not enough dressing-gown cred
* Not if you're interested.....
Brokeback Mountain?
So if I invited you around to my place for beer, pizza and a movie and you woke up the next day with a condom up your arse, would you tell anyone?
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