Probing questions...

I'm not a particularly intelligent guy, and any confession about lacking knowledge is hardly going to be a startling revelation to anyone, but that still doesn't dissuade me from continuing my ongoing quest to answer the important questions, and the current crop is as probably as intriguing as the lancing of a cyst, but I'll plough right in, anyway.

*Why do some people insist on keeping the tags on their baseball caps, and why are they predominantly B-people?
*Why does the Transport For London marketing campaign have the last two letters of 'London' in red?
*Did Pete Doherty really get one away with Kate Moss? If so, how?
*Is 'Test Drive My Girlfriend' the most ridiculous 'reality TV' program in history?
*Why do 'reality TV' shows anger me so much?
*If I was to draft Nick Dal Santo into my Fantasty Football Team, would he instantly have a long-term injury like Hadley and Darcy managed within days of me 'drafting' them?
*Does my drafting genetically alter people?
*Does anyone else have any idea about what I'm babbling about?
*How does Ricky Ponting fail to defend 434?
*Who would win a fight out of Pauline Hanson, and the band Hanson?
*How can the Brits be giving me shit about the CommGames when we doubled their medal tally?
*Why do the French riot every other month?
*Why doesn't Hugh Heffner answer my emails?
*Is 'Brokeback Mountain' a bad film to watch with another bloke?

I need to know these things...

I'm going to hell.....

DJD:- "Man, there are a lot of blind people around here. [Wembley]"
CBJ:- "You're right, I saw one this morning actually! But he didn't see me."
DJD:- *Laughing* "Shut up, you can't say that so loud, she [the blind woman] will hear you!"
CBJ:- "It's ok, she wont know who said it!"

Dog'o'rama...

It seems that most - if not all - of my predictions were somewhat incorrect, but there was definitely some success in the evening, even if it was geared around Doc throwing off his Barcelona form and displaying a surpisingly refreshing team mentality!

In the end though, getting out-drank by a Polish girl was not the most stellar of performances, but having been hilariously rejected by some English bird a few hours earlier, it was in perspective. It's kind of like Australia losing the Ashes, bound to happen every now and then, but to be fair, there were mitigating circumstances.

Predictions of tonight...

It's like 930pm and I'm about to head to the best club in London, the Spotted Dog in Willesden Green. This place is renowned as a hot-spot for English and Antipodean talent, and I am making the following predictions about tonight.

*DJD will pick up and shag the type of girl that you need a team of sherpas if you wish to attempt to ascend.
*BTLC is wearing a shirt reminiscent of scouts and/or truck drivers from the US Highway crew. He will Stockholm-up and do some dodgy girl down an alley, and I'm not referring to a street location, type alley.
*Doc will be moody, awaiting for some Iranian to assault him.
*CBJ will get into a random brawl with either a drunken Pom or some Doc-moody-making-Iranian.
*TheShearer will be angry for not being a part of the festivities.

How do you spell 'ominous foreshadowing'?

An update will be given tomorrow as to the outcome of tonight's activities.

Fact!

Back in the saddle...

It's almost the three month anniversary since my last post, and although I was really hoping I could achieve this landmark, the avalanche of emails begging me to start posting was the impetus for this phenomenal return.

I've thrown in a ludicrous picture of me standing in the middle of the Daugava river, in Riga, Latvia. As you can see, not only have I morphed into a cone-head, but I've also mastered the 'ridiculous pose'. It takes a lot of application to be able to perform to that level.